Sunday, April 7, 2019

He Said That? Part 6 (Parental Guidance Suggested)



As mentioned in the previous post, Star Scott has said some peculiar things in recent days. It seems clear that he himself does not recognize the inappropriateness of his own thought process and subsequent messages to his church.

There has always been a pattern of Scott speaking unseemly and unbiblical comments. Perhaps those inside Calvary Temple have become immune to his tasteless illustrations, but I remember being unsettled (to say the least) by the personal stories of his own sex life. I was not alone, many were very upset at his description of his daily sex life. (and even more so when he spoke directly to the youth and young adults). And how many times did we hear of the near naked girl in coveralls in a room with 2 people fornicating on a mattress behind him? It always sounded more like fascination on his part.

So once again, Star Scott reveals his own inner thought process during a recent meeting. Scott attempted to dissuade his congregants from their apparent widespread and destructive habit of gossiping about one another. Apparently, there is strife, infighting, discord, and all manner of dissension throughout the congregation.

In order to convey the seriousness of the gossiping taking place within the church, Scott does not turn to scripture (of which there are many) to encourage his congregation toward righteousness and away from gossip and strife. No, he apparently has a better way. He uses an illustration of his own devising to portray the seriousness of gossip.

"How about following a worship service, turning on an x rated pornographic film in the back corner over there and practice some fornication in the auditorium and yet we’ll gossip in the auditorium."

Please keep in mind that there are children present in these meetings. And we know from previous messages, there are many men with a pornography addiction in the church. I would assume that as you read Scott's admonition, you had a clear image of what he imagined in his own mind. And so did the children. And everyone else.

One of the warning signs of a potentially sexually abusive pastor is listed here:

"[The]pastor may begin making inappropriate comments (sensual, suggestive, questionable, etc.) during the sermon, Bible study, etc."

Take heed, Calvary Temple. It is common knowledge that your pastor was accused of sexual child abuse when a youth pastor, and has been implicated in abusive situations, as well as the covering up of other abuses. Members of CT can name multiple examples of rumors or outright knowledge of sexual (or other forms of) abuse. When the pastor himself is using sexual illustrations, you should sit up and take notice. And then run. Especially if you have children. 

Please read the following and decide if any (or all) apply to your situation.

Are You Covering for an Abusive Pastor? by Denah Michelle Moon

From the July 2011 edition of HopeSpeak)

Signs you may be covering for a pastor who abuses the flock spiritually:

  1. You've noticed a pattern of people leaving the fellowship, but you hesitate to ask your pastor about it and don't like to delve into the reasons behind the exits.
  2. You've seen your pastor act in retribution for slights or criticism by removing people from ministries, publicly or privately shaming them or refusing to listen to them.
  3. You excuse your pastor's wrong behavior: He's young (or he's old), he doesn't understand the people who are unhappy, he has a little trouble relating to people, he'll grow out of it, I'm probably not seeing the whole picture, God will show him his weaknesses and he'll handle things better soon, no pastor is perfect in every way, he's such a good preacher that we can overlook the other parts of his calling.
  4. You find yourself blaming victims. You justify harsh behavior by your pastor by focusing on the sins or weaknesses of those who are shamed or shunned or criticized or punished.
  5. You feel that to protect the name of Christ in your community you need to keep secret the alarming behavior by your pastor or leaders in the church.
  6. You feel it's your duty to think the best of your pastor, no matter what charges are brought against him (but you don't extend the same courtesy to those who feel they've been abused or harmed).
  7. You feel it's okay for your pastor to build up your church by criticizing other churches with "inferior" doctrines or practices, but it's not okay for anyone to question decisions by church leaders if it looks like criticism.
  8. You enjoy being flattered by your pastor and seek to please him often. You spend a lot of time in church flattering and seeking approval from your pastor.
  9. You are frequently in fear of being criticized by your pastor or having your ministry in the church taken away.
  10. You've seen your pastor flatter those he can use and then later turn on them or ignore them.
  11. You would feel uncomfortable asking to see financial records of the church, and you are willing to just assume that they are being used in a godly manner.
  12. You feel constant pressure to help more in church or to give more, or both.
  13. Going to church often seems like a burden, but you don't want anyone to know you feel that way.
  14. You have criticized other churches or individuals with your pastor.
  15. You like the feeling of being in the "inner circle," and you sometimes feel you have the pastor's confidence in a way no one else does.
  16. You often feel a little bit superior to Christians who don't witness as much as you, or who don't practice their faith as well as you, or who don't emphasize certain doctrines as much as you do.
  17. You feel that no one quite understands the scriptures, delivers sermons or reaches out to the weak and poor like your pastor does.
  18. You spend much time defending your pastor, either in your own mind or to others.
  19. You don't like to admit it, but you often spend more time thinking about your pastor or leaders than you do about God (whether positively, negatively or both).
  20. You are exhausted.

If many of these items speak to you, it might be a good idea to evaluate what your role in your church really is. Are you providing a constant stream of "narcissistic supply" for your pastor? Is your main role to make him look good? Do you equate making him look good with powerful ministry in your community? You can serve many years believing you are doing good in your church by covering spiritual abuse for your leader, while really doing great harm. Check out the signs of spiritual abuse. If they look familiar, and you feel you may have had a hand in perpetuating it, all is not lost.

You can recognize the harm and turn from it, even if it's been a long time coming.

* This article refers not only to clergy sexual abuse, but to abuse of power in other ways, such as financial, spiritual, emotional, etc.*


used by permission of Denah Michelle Moon



Once again, Calvary Temple, you are being warned. Please research signs of an abusive church, an authoritarian church, a toxic church, etc. You will be shocked at how Calvary Temple of Sterling, VA fits the vast majority of descriptions.

It is not too late to get out of Calvary Temple. Here are my suggestions:

do not talk to "friends" about leaving (they will report you)
do not agree to meetings with leadership (it only makes it worse)
do not hope things will change (they won't)
do not hesitate, just go





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